I have been feeling various forms of nostalgia lately. Not to mention I have fallen in love with using that word to describe my longing for people, things,times, places. Today I want to explore this feeling more by what the world knows as blogging about it. To start off with people I have quite a few. There are however certain ones that I feel I long for their presence more than others.
Erin Benton:
Erin Benton is my cousin. We are four months apart and have been pretty much inseparable for most of our lives but more so the past 6 years. Basically we like to do weird things like jumping up to give high fives, sporting pig tails, and trying to capture our shadows in the moment as well as ourselves. However, this inseparableness has been impacted as of late due to our attending different universities. Although currently we are only a couple of hours apart it has proven to be quite the task to get together with school, jobs, musicals, family, and other silly things that tend to get in the way of two long lost cousins. Basically Erin is my other half. We have been through enough together to write a pretty decent book that would capture the heart of our impenetrable relationship. Yes, that's correct. We are rock solid. Best friends. Cousins. Sisters. I cannot imagine my life without her and owe so much of who I am to her good character and coaching abilities. Erin is my strength in many ways. We have laughed until we cried and cried until we laughed. We know each other well enough that we basically feel the same way on many issues that come up, and yet we are different enough that we go to each other to seek advice when we are stuck. Words really cannot describe our relationship I'm realizing as I type this long winded paragraph. So the fact that I love her will just have to do.
Nostalgic for Cousin time.
Next up McKenna Rose:
This is my roommate and one of my best friends McKenna. She is currently serving in Mexico as a teacher with my other roommate Carly (who I will talk about later). She is one of the best people I know. She's strong, solid, charismatic, loving, and full of life. Not to mention you give her a task and she gets to work and isn't satisfied until it is glowing with magnificence! We are going on our 4th semester rooming together and I wouldn't have it any other way. She is a wonder to live with. Pillow talks, sweet notes, beds made with love, and silence when she knew I needed it. She knows when to hug and when to leave alone and when to console or just when to cuddle and let me cry. We know each other well and have come to respect one another. My heart aches for my Otter :) I can't seem to describe these emotions inside of me but I get choked up often and just want a big hug. McKenna is one of those people that just knows. She has a testimony and she really does everything she can to help it grow. She knows she is imperfect like the rest of us and is constantly trying to fix those areas in need of fixing without changing herself. She is passionate and good and always someone willing to cuddle. It was different last year, something has definitely changed with her and I. A bond deeper than words can described has formed through countless trials, laughter spells, sleepovers, heartaches, and numerous hugs. She is one of my greatest exemplars. She has so much knowledge about life and intellectually as well. I admire her greatly. I will always be in gratitude to her. She is a large part of who I am today and who I want to continue to become.
Nostalgic for Kenna.
Carly Kay:
Where do I even start? I feel like this blog is just making all of this worse, and that I'm really NOT getting any of these feelings spoken the way I would like. Oh well. Onward. Carly Kay Berg is one of the best people I know. I mean that wholeheartedly. She loves everyone. She doesn't speak poorly and she finds joy in every aspect of life. She is so sweet and sensitive. She has come to know me very well over this past year and a half (we are also going on our 4th semester living together) and she has been there as one of my best supporters and best friends the whole way through. Something I love about Carly, and I realize this is odd, is how tender she looks when she is trying not to cry. Her big beautiful green eyes completely fill with liquid and she tries so hard not to let them spill over and I can always tell she is truly touched, upset, overwhelmed, etc. She feels unlike anyone I've ever seen before. She loves deeply. She is rooted and strong. She finds joy and gives some of the best hugs. On the other hand Carly is one of the funniest people I have ever met. She has the most obnoxious laugh ( I think it even beats mine!) and can make me cry from laughter no matter what mood I'm in due to her hilarious jokes and wise cracks. Not to mention we are both in love with David Archuleta and walked 30 minutes to meet him and have been to two of his concerts. Yes TWO and were the ones standing and screaming and singing through almost the whole concert. Carly is my sunshine-even though she loves the rain. She is a sweet soul and she has touched my life and affected it forever.
Nostalgic for Carly.
Now for something a little new and fresh but honestly the nostalgia has been there for a while:
Cameron Mulder-
This guy is a sweetheart, charming, a genuine person. I won't say too much on this subject because its technically a pending matter but I will say this: I care about him and am going to celebrate the beginning of Spring with him in a few weeks! Thank goodness that longing feeling will be gone for a few days at least. I realize the feeling of longing to be in his presence will come and go with our tendency to never be in the same place at the same time. However I've realized that distance really does make the heart grow fonder. It's worth giving it a shot in my book :) All I can say is he is wonderful and he is real. And I've already said too much.
Nostalgic for Cameron.
Then there is my darling Erika Larsson:
I love this girl, as you can probably tell by the picture. She is strong willed, independent, spicy, and yet extremely talented, motherly, and spiritual. Sure we clash here and there but overall she has been a huge blessing in my life. She has taught me that what it's like to live in the moment and to have no fear. She has taught me it's okay to have no tact once in a while and that standing up for yourself is a necessity. Erika has come through and shined through her trials and struggles. She is a warrior woman. I love her and am grateful for her sisterhood. The past few months that I've been home and she has been at school in Rexburg we have been able to talk every week or so. It's been sweet because we've pretty much only had each other and we know each other well enough to sense when something is wrong through a simple text--or a phone call starting with tears. It's amazing what you can learn from living with girls of different backgrounds and lifestyles.
Nostalgic for Erika Baby.
Then there's these two goobers: Stephanie and Brindisi
Brindisi is fierce. She tackled her first semester of college like it was a breeze. I love her dearly and am always inspired by her incredible faith and talents she has been blessed with. She is creative and spunky and just awesome. Everyone wants to be her friend and I got to be her roommate AND friend. Better deal in my book. She has a super sweet and sensitive side as well that I often felt I was led to when she needed a shoulder to cry on or someone to vent to.
This is miss Stephanie Skeans. A fun, enthusiastic, brave girl. She is beautiful inside and out and although she would deny all the nice things I love to say about her she really is a great person. She is one of the most caring people I know.
Nostalgic for Stephanie and Brindisi.
Now there are many more people that I miss dearly but know I will either get to see soon or at some point in my life. However this blog is about people I am currently thinking about a lot and just missing having them as an active part of my life (although there are definitely some missing). This last person is someone I miss dearly. She is also someone I admire greatly, yet someone I didn't get to know very well. We had a very neat bond for the 6 years that we knew each other. I know I will meet her again someday. Lately I have been missing her deeply.
Meet Patricia Horne. My beautiful grandmother. I was 3 or 4 years old in this picture. I miss her incredibly. She died prematurely when I was nearly 7 years old. I remember walking up to her casket and patting her cold hand and saying "Bye grandma, I love you." She called me her angel and would always protect me from the unruly boys in our family. She loved me more than I'll ever know or understand. I literally was her pride and joy and am just learning now how deeply she loved me. She loved ladybugs and passed that love along to me along with her ladybug collection (decorations, not dead ladybugs). She was the most amazing woman and I wish I had known her better. I was recently doing some family history research and saw she had all of her work done for her and had been sealed to my Grandpa Bob who died 6 months after she did. I miss them all so much and long for the day when I can be back in my angel's arms.
Nostalgic for Grandma Pat :)
Now this has turned into a long post so I think I am just going to list and not necessarily explain the other things and places I am nostalgic for.
Things:
Old movies
Suspense of reading a Harry Potter novel
Kisses that set off fireworks
Holding hands (wow apparently I miss romance)
Swimming in the ocean
Summer nights
Catching Junebugs
Dancing in the apartment
Dancing with a boy
Singing with my quartet
I had to post a picture. My sisters in harmony.
Continuing on...
Decorating my pending future apartment
Sleeping with my puppies...who are no longer puppies
Eating cereal for dessert
Roadtrips with my family sining to oldies CDs and the Carpenters tape we have over and over again
Watching a good sunset
Family gatherings
Being tan
Sand in my ears
Being educated
I know there are more but these are what immediately come to mind
Places:
the Beach
BYU-Idaho
Rexburg
Mt. Bony waterfall
Borregos Springs
The Taylor Chapel
The Temple
The top of Pt. Dume
As for times there are too many to count so I will leave it at I am nostalgic for the memories I hold dearly to my heart. However that nostalgic only makes me smile at the lessons I learned, people I loved, and places I have been. My life has been a wonderful journey so far and I continue to find joy in every step of the way.
